Obstacles

This is an essay I submitted to my college advisor when asked to write an essay about what our greatest weakness(es) as a teacher will be.

Obstacles

            For quite some time now I have known I wanted to be a high school English teacher. It is truthfully the only thing I feel I would be good at, besides perhaps psychology, and I feel like it is a wonderful career choice. However, there are certain things about myself, certain obstacles I must overcome, that will hinder my success in this field. Unfortunately, I am a procrastinator, I am somewhat lazy, and I am sometimes impatient and irritable. These are all things I am working on improving, not just for the benefit of my future students, but also for the benefit of myself. They are not the only weaknesses I have, but I believe they are the largest.

            I am a procrastinator, and I am lazy. These go hand in hand to me, because I only procrastinate because I am lazy. I, like most people, don’t like doing work. It stresses me out, so I avoid it. For example, I am writing this essay on the day it is due. I could offer excuses like, I have been sick all weekend, or I have had other responsibilities, but these excuses are, while true, just that: excuses. The annoying part about my procrastination is that in the long run, it stresses me out more than it would if I would just do it immediately. When the time comes for my assignment to be submitted (or whatever the case may be) I worry myself to death and cram things in until it is done. Now, I know this is a problem. It is an issue I am actively working on and have made some semblance of progress in. Hopefully, by the time I begin, or at least finish, student teaching, I will have a better grasp on myself and on my time management. I do not want my students to suffer because their teacher didn’t properly prepare before class.

            I am impatient and irritable. This is also a problem I have identified and am actively working on. Sometimes I have a tendency to lose patience with those people who are close to me, like my son and my fiancé. Honestly, it really makes no sense, because once I get snappy, I already know it’s for no reason. I have a tendency to be impatient with people who do not grasp concepts as quickly as I do, even though I know it is unfair for me to think that way. I know people learn at different paces and in different ways, but sometimes I get somewhat impatient. This issue has only presented itself to me in the type school setting where I am a student however. I am not sure if it would be the same from a teaching perspective, because, until now, I have not gotten impatient with someone I was giving instruction to. This could be due to the fact that my approach to situations is different as a teacher. Nevertheless, I need to make sure this doesn’t ever adversely affect my students.

            I pride myself sometimes in being able to identify the things in me that need work and need to be fixed. I am a human being, and we all have flaws. However, I also know that identifying the flaws is only the first step of solving the larger problem. In my next couple years, while I am still a student above all, I will look for ways for me to help myself with this. I will find different ways to approach problems and situations to compensate for my weaknesses. I deeply care about the profession of teaching, and about the impact of a teacher on the lives of his or her students. For this reason, I never want to lose my patience, or procrastinate about something that could negatively affect the education of any student in my classroom.